His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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