1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Randomize