I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Randomize
