Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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