How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
