Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
