she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
My bed smells like the plague
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize