Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
