Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i wish my penis had a tongue
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
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