so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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