What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
