But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
