she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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