Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I have peed in a lot of sinks
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
