I'd wear matching sweaters with you
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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