The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize