I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
