Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
