how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
