I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
