I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
