kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
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