wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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