We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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