in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
