Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Randomize
