This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Randomize
