it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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