He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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