Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
You are the jesus of drinking
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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