grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
