I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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