I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
