felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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