My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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