I'm drive I can fine osifer
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize