i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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