I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
