playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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