do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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