is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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