if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
