Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
