we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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