he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
