Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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