I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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