She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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