Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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