I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
